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Greetings and compelling sea migrations, meet Captain Cruise, though the tag on the back of his underwear says Greg Berzinsky.
He’s our ascot-wearing, smooth-as-private-collection-scotch, bespokesman and guide to the treasure trove of finely curated river cruises at crui.se.
If you want to blitzkrieged on cheap margarita mix with unending views of empty ocean, the Royal Caribbean Carbon Footprint Of The Sea might be for you.
But for classy, elevated cruising, it’s all about that sweet sliver of river.
Captain Cruise sailed down the Euphrates and back. But on the return, they renamed it His-phrates.
He’s twirled a Mademoiselle on the Moselle.
He won Most Debonair on the Danube
Captain Cruise was a captain before water was invented
Tide charts look Captain Cruise up.
Captain Cruise once found a message in a bottle but still hasn’t had time to read it.
Captain Cruise doesn’t disembark the ship, the ship disembarks Captain Cruise.
Captain Cruise sailed around the world in 80 days, in 4 hours.
And if you think that impossible, Captain Cruise didn’t do his Maths homework, his maths homework did… actually he was busy cruising.
Let’s Hear from the Captain
He’ll tell you which full-bodied red pairs best with squab or which river cruise is perfect for nature lovers on their anniversary.
Once upon a time there was a great sea captain named Captain Cruise who was running late to a frolic at a Count’s chateau. Now go to sleep.
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Departing on the 14th of August sailing in a Lower Deck Cabin.
AVG PER PERSON* £4,173
Departing on the 14th of August to 14th of August
AVG PER PERSON* £4,173
AVG PER PERSON* £4,173
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